A Personal Note from our Tantra Expert, Kerri Cust
“Prior to beginning my tantric path, I had the strong belief that I needed to be ‘the good girl’. As I delved into tantra, I began to explore another part of myself, the more sexual aspect. I found that by diving into this sexual being, I unleashed an energy within me that made me feel so alive. As I allowed this to be, it became a part of who I am today and I now show up more fully, not only in my relationships, but in every aspect of my life.”
WhatisTantra?
The Sanskrit word "tantra"comes from the root: tan: to expand/stretchandtra: to save
In its true form tantra is a spiritual path. It is a road to liberation, a holistic approach that does not condemn the luxuries and pleasures of this world but one that indulges them; which includes sexual freedom.
In Tantra, we see everything as divine and because everything is divine nothing should be denied or suppressed, but rather accepted and integrated into our lives and who we are. The tantric path calls for us to abandon old, familiar and conditioned ways of thinking which can be incredibly challenging to new practitioners. Tantra asks us to step into a space where experiences we once condemned and that were full of shame, become seen as a part of who we are and we begin to embody and show these aspects to the world.
Tantra invites us to see our desires as sacred. Once we participate in such desires with the mindset of what we are doing as divine, then our shame and suppression can begin to dissolve and we can show up more fully as our joyous and authentic selves.
Whatmakessex"tantric"?
Many people think that tantric sex looks like two people, with their hands on each others hearts gazing into each other’s eyes for hours and having slow love making. Now tantric sex “could” look like this, but this alone does not make sex tantric.
There are four main concepts that when practiced together during love making, make sex tantric.
We first practice Consecration, invoking the divine into our lovemaking and offering any benefits back to the divine principle.
One of the foundations of tantra and tantric sex is, Brachmacharya, the containment of our sexual energy. With sexual energy being one of the most powerful forces on the planet, it is not something we want to expel and waste. We want to keep this energy within our being and achieve higher states of consciousness with it. This looks like men experiencing multiple orgasms without ejaculating and women having implosive vaginal orgasms.
Tantric sex helps us to achieve high states of consciousness during lovemaking through the act of Sublimation. Sublimation is where we move our powerful and dense sexual energy and raise it up our chakras (preferably to our crown chakra located at the top of the head) to higher and more subtle states of being.
The final aspect of tantric sex is Transfiguration, which is defined as seeing your partner as Divine. This is where we have surpassed the ego and see our loved one as the Divine creature they ultimately are. This is ultimately the goal and the path of tantra.
When we reach this state, we not only see our partner as divine, we also witness our partner seeing us as divine and we see ourselves as divine as well. This has the potential to bring depth and connection not only to our romantic relationship(s) but depth and meaning to how we show up in every aspect of our lives. Knowing and experiencing ourselves as Divine awakens an inner knowing of divinity and worthiness.
Whypracticetantra?
Most of us today are looking for something more, a sense of fulfillment and experiences of true, deep connection. We are feeling this pull and desire for more and we still want to have our luxuries and explore pleasure and desire. This is where tantra comes in. Tantra does not ask for anything to be limited, suppressed or ignored, it is quite the opposite actually.
Let us take sex as an example. Sex is loaded with shame and guilt and at the same time it is something many of us are curious about exploring. Who does not want to experience more pleasure and better sex with their partner?
In tantra, nothing is off limits, it is all seen as Divine. If we see love making with the mentality that sex is something sacred and divine, then opportunity for deepening our connection with our beloved is more likely.
Practicing tantric sexuality can lead to other benefits as well. When we begin to awaken our sexual energy we become more vital and our inhibitions begin to fall away. When we begin to awaken our sexual energy we must remember that we are igniting energy, and energy is everywhere so when we become more aware of our sexuality it does not just affect our sex life, if it has an impact on every aspect of our life. For example, if you start to become less inhibited in the bedroom, you will become less inhibited in your career; possibly asking for that promotion or pay rise. You will begin to experience yourself as having less inhibitions in all other areas of your life; including your friendships, creativity, health, spirituality, etc.
Tantra is a spiritual path that has the potential to unleash everything that has been suppressed and to make it holy. By awakening ourselves in this way, one can feel more alive, fulfilled, authentic, and fully present, as we show up in our relationship with our beloved.
What could be better than that?
Tantric Sex
